Do you believe in fate?

It seems that crying is becoming my new hobby lately. Every night before I sleep, every day when I wake up and whenever my mind starts to wonder, tears starts flowing. When is this going to stop????? 1 week? 1 month? 1 year? You said that I won't feel so hurt after this but right now this pain is just unbearable and its more painful then what I used to go through.

Today I force myself to go out in order to keep staying in my room as whenever I enter my room the feeling of loosing you comes back to haunt me over and over again. Getting up early even before my alarm ring is something new as I hardly ever will wake up before my alarm starts shouting at me.

This few days I also keep thinking how would I react or how should I react if I see you again? But never will I though that I will bum into you. You seem really calm as if nothing ever happen but I just stunned and tears started piling up in my eyes but I try to stop myself as I was in the train. Lucky I was only stopping after 1 station and first thing in my mind was to rush into the toilet so that nobody sees me crying. However I feel ashamed as my eyes were reddish and swollen.

After watching G-Force, my friend went back straight and I was left alone walking around wandering on my own for a couple of hours. It has been a long long time ever since I wander around in a shopping complex by myself. I never did like the feeling so I went to MPH Bookstore to pass time and also left earlier since I have nothing better to do.

By next week I would have to face you again and I hope I can control and refrain myself from crying but it wouldn't be easy and its not the first time my friends see me crying as I am a cry baby and I was called by that nick ever since I was a kid.

To me being in a relationship has its own challenges as life is never easy and are full of challenges but it never occurs to me that you will give up so fast without really going through that much. Perhaps you were really not into me...I wouldn't know since you seem to be perfectly fine when I saw you today.

I guess that will be enough for the day. Just want to say, There is only one thing in happiness that is to love and be loved.

P.S. I will always love you.